
Ah Bali...what a fast-paced, crazy yet relaxing place....an enigma....so many shops, so many motorbikes, so many vendors, buy buy buy!!! But hey don't tax yourself, you're on holiday, here have a lovely cocktail. Hey why not get a massage, manicure and pedicure while you're at it? Should we catch some gnarly waves dude or laze by one of three pools? mmmm hard decisions. You hungry? Sorry all we have is super fresh seafood and around a gazillion international restaurants... I'm sorry but you'll just have to have the lobster whether you want it or not...here have a beer while you think it over. Is that your son? What a beauty! Let us all adore him to such an extent that it takes you twenty minutes to walk past three shops. Just one more cuddle, no you go ahead and enjoy your lunch, I'm going to look after him for free. Off to the spa again? You deserve it. Please have another cocktail. I'm sorry, is that sunset hurting your eyes? The people, oh yes they are friendly.

Legian Beach - Just a few bikes
We stayed in Legian a little north of Kuta on the same long strip of beach. Legian is a little quieter and more family oriented but still close to the action if that's your thing. We stayed at the Jayakarta which is right on the beach and has apartments as well as rooms, very handy for families. There is a private road running along in front of the resort that is blocked off to traffic...a godsend as crossing the roads in Bali is a bit hair-raising for those carrying babies! Take all the road rules, give them a good shaking and then just ignore them. There are so many motorbikes it's like a never ending bikie festival, if bikies rode mopeds! We saw entire families on one bike, mum, dad, and the little tuckers, I kid you not.
Ronan and I enjoying the pavillion - poolside at Jayakarta
The street vendors were not as bad as expected, if you told them "no thanks" they pretty much stayed away. They are not allowed on resort grounds or the private road anymore, this is good because in the old days you would get swamped wherever you were, which makes it kind of hard to relax. Still we did decline the beach massages, you say yes to one vendor then all of a sudden you are surrounded by people, each one working on a piece of you. Of course they all want payment at the end. We saw one guy with about ten people around him, you couldn't see anything but about four inches of his pasty white legs sticking out...looked like a bunch of thirsty uni students crowding a bar on two for one drinks night. We preferred the spa option, beautiful rooms with flower filled baths and glorious two hour treatments for little more than $10.
Spa overlooking rice paddies - Ubud
According to a few Bali veterans there were very few tourists compared to the old days. The Balinese are really suffering after the bomb attacks, with low tourist numbers leading to high unemployment. Despite this they are overwhelmingly friendly and the vendors have become less aggressive in their tactics, which is kind of odd really.
Kamandalu Resort - Ubud
OK lets head up to the hills...Ubud. More of the same but instead of sand and surf we have rice paddies, art, vicious monkeys and you guessed it markets and bargains galore. We stayed at the Kamandalu Resort, which is quite simply heaven. Imagine a five star Balinese village with villas all made of stone and thatched roofs, set out on a hillside in the middle of fertile rice paddies. We had our own garden villa, with a private garden and a tower with a large daybed overlooking the valley. The best thing was the outdoor shower, so great to have a shower while looking at the stars. So peaceful and serene, a great contrast to the hustle and bustle of Kuta and even downtown Ubud.

Our Garden Villa - Kamandalu
Ubud is an artist village so there's lots of work on show, it's a bit hard to work out originals from copies though so we just window shopped. It also has a great market and the Monkey Forest. The MF is where my beloved husband managed to receive a rather nasty bite from a vicious male monkey that wanted Ronans' nappy bag. Mikey fought him off but I dare say he may have come off second best. Thank god it wasn't rabid and antiseptic was on hand. The forest is lovely and has a few nice temple ruins but the fact that they let tourists feed the monkeys is probably not the best thing as they can become quite aggressive when they want something. One jumped on our pram and stole a rusk right out of Ronans hand. If Mikey hadn't already been bitten I may have found this funny, but knowing that they can turn aggressive at the drop of a hat meant I was shitting myself. Ronan took it all in his stride. Little tough man. So be wary about going there if you have kids, the monkeys look cute but are unpredictable.
Monkey bite - this was taken about three days later, it's actually looking better here...ouch! by the way this was through a T-shirt the monkeys teeth didn;t atually break through, thank god.
Monitor Lizard Sculpture - Monkey Forest
Ubud is also the fine dining region of Bali, so even more fabulous restaurants to try. Having said that, one of the best meals we had was from the village near our resort. Mikey found Nasi Goreng (Indonesian fried rice with chicken and egg) for 75cents from a little hole in the wall that was out of this world. Needless to say we loved our time in Bali and can't wait to return. It's not as picturesque in the tropical beach way of Fiji or Vanuatu, although I'm sure there are places I haven't been in Bali that rival those. Certainly the rice paddies and forest around Ubud are gorgeous. I regret to say that we didn't do anything very cultural on our trip. This is extremely unusual for us, I guess that means we'll just have to go back!
Valley - Kamandalu Resort
There's just something about the craziness of Bali and the wonderful people that makes you want to return. Not to mention the very favourable exchange rate, so strange to go somewhere were our currency is valuable. Oh yeh and they sell petrol in bottles...this could be happening here if the prices keep going up!
